DARE: Dare to take God at his word. Dare to trust Jesus Christ for salvation. Dare to pray, "Lord Jesus, I'm a sinner. but you have shown your love for me by dying to forgive my sins, and you have proven your power to save me from death by your resurrection. Lord, change my heart, and save me by your grace."
LOVE IS JESUS CHRIST! True love is found in Christ alone. It isn't until after we have received His gift of new life by accepting death in our place, and accepting His forgiveness of sins......will you be ready for this REAL LOVE DARE!
If you are reading this blog, and focusing on your own marriage, know that the next statement that I make is from the book, however, it is my life story...and maybe yours. Everything I Have failed at and haven't been able to do, every minute I have wasted trying to fix things my own way - all of it is now forgiven and made right by putting my life into the hands of the One who first gave it to me.
We are born sinful. "Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me" Ps 51:5 We are all sinners. That doesn't mean we must make an excuse for sin. If you are Christian, we know better. But the truth is, we all sin. It isn't like God sends innocent people to hell! We all deserve it. One sin isn't worse than another. They are all equal in God's eyes, and Satan's eyes. The smallest thing, like a lie, is probably the worst! As Cory said in Sunday school yesterday, lying is a gateway sin. If satan can get you there, he can gradually get you anywhere. However, God sent His only son so that we might live through him. By His death, he made invalid the idea that we are unloved because of our sin. Sometimes, I admit, I feel that way. I look to this world for love...and even to my husband. But here is the key, if I ever feel that way, my eyes are off the CROSS. All the love I will ever need in this life, should come from the CROSS!
Love like that can't be understood. Love like that can't be earned. Love like that must be received.....And when we get this, we are free to love in ways we are not capable of. Love for my spouse comes from God! No from some little lustful love I once had. True genuine love...which means doing things for him when I don't want to. - Which means, taking him to eat sushy today (yuck). Which means not going in to work on a day off - just to spend time with him. It means putting him first. Finding ways to love him, because God loves him, and God wants me to reveal His love for Cory through me! What an awesome task God has assigned to me!
1 John 4:8 says, the one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. This means I now share the same type of love with Cory. For those reading this and even the moments where I feel Cory is distracted, I must show love even when it isn't shown in return. Doesn't God do that for us over and over again? I can see his flaws and imperections, and still chose to love him. Although I will never be able to meet their needs like God can, I can be used as instrument for God's work. Now until death...and even in death!
So I say it again:
True love is found in Christ alone. It isn't until after we have received His gift of new life by accepting death in our place, and accepting His forgiveness of sins......will you be ready for this REAL LOVE DARE!
Monday, January 17, 2011
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Day 19: Love is Impossible
DARE: Look back over the dares from the previous days. Were there some that seemed impossible to you? Have you realized the need for God to change your heart and to give you the ability to love? Ask for him to show you where you stand with him, and ask for the strength and grace to settle your eternal destination.
This day is deep. So get ready....
This love dare so far has been things to work on on your own. Trying to become less selfish and be more considerate of your spouse. well, today, my eyes are open. I am slowly realizing that true love (agape love) can not come from me. I can't make myself love Cory unconditional. I can't just wake up one day and say 'I'm going to love Cory more now', even though I've tried so many times on my own. It is beyond what I can do. It is only from God. He can only make you love your spouse unconditionally. Because of His great love for ME, and His great love for CORY - he Choses to express HIS love through me! Isn't that amazing?! Think about it. GOD CREATED ME, MADE ME, CHOSE ME to LOVE CORY and EXPRESS HIS LOVE to HIM! FOR HIM! So, my job on this earth is to show my spouse, and others, GOD"s LOVE! WOW.... People see love from other people. God wants us to show HIM to other people. Man I have been missing this all along!
I can't muster up enough unconditional, long-term, sacrificial love from my heart. It isn't in me! I can't! GOD CAN! My sacrificial love has caused me to fail, many many times. Thinking evil against Cory, and against my family....only because of that sacrificial love. How many times I have my love proven tp be incapable of controlling my anger or allowed unforgiveness in my heart? Here is what the Bible says:
We all demonstrate selfishness, hatred, and pride. And unless something is done to cleanse of us of these ungodly attribute, we will stand before God guilty as charged. (paraphrase Romans 6:23) THAT'S WHY IF YOU ARE NOT RIGHT WITH GOD, you can't truly love your spouse, because He is the source of that love! Makes sens huh?! I haven't been able to love Cory the way he needed, the way God intended, because I haven't been truly, truly right with God! I haven't been in His word. I haven't' been praying like I should....But NOW, as this Sunday approaches. TODAY is a day of worship! Today is a day where I am right with God. Today is a day where I will love God, and I Will love Cory through God. Not of myself, but of GOD!
The one thing that is bothering me about today, is those I love who aren't in Christ. Marriages fail because someone isn't in Christ. I confess I haven't prayed for those like I should, and I must begin today. Without God's love in the marriage, things are hopeless. Agape love can't be generated. LOVE IS FROM GOD! (1 John 4:7)
But here is something to remember: "HE is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or thing, according tho the power that works within us" Eph 3:20 This is my new favorite verse!
My goal today: Stop resisting the Love of God. Stop rejecting his forgiveness and forgiveness of others. It is a tough road for me, which has caused depression. But I must focus on the LOVE OF GOD. The truth is I can't live without HIM, and I can't love Cory without him. Just imagine if I out my marriage in HIS hands?! Look what HE has already done!
Pray with me about something...I'm thinking of asking Cory to start doing the dare with me. Today actually starts Day 20 (I didn't blog yesterdays) and I feel that the beginning was all superficial..things I needed. I think we might could start growing as a family if we focus on the next 20, because it seems to be about your relationship with God more too. If he is reading this...maybe he will pray too! :)
This day is deep. So get ready....
This love dare so far has been things to work on on your own. Trying to become less selfish and be more considerate of your spouse. well, today, my eyes are open. I am slowly realizing that true love (agape love) can not come from me. I can't make myself love Cory unconditional. I can't just wake up one day and say 'I'm going to love Cory more now', even though I've tried so many times on my own. It is beyond what I can do. It is only from God. He can only make you love your spouse unconditionally. Because of His great love for ME, and His great love for CORY - he Choses to express HIS love through me! Isn't that amazing?! Think about it. GOD CREATED ME, MADE ME, CHOSE ME to LOVE CORY and EXPRESS HIS LOVE to HIM! FOR HIM! So, my job on this earth is to show my spouse, and others, GOD"s LOVE! WOW.... People see love from other people. God wants us to show HIM to other people. Man I have been missing this all along!
I can't muster up enough unconditional, long-term, sacrificial love from my heart. It isn't in me! I can't! GOD CAN! My sacrificial love has caused me to fail, many many times. Thinking evil against Cory, and against my family....only because of that sacrificial love. How many times I have my love proven tp be incapable of controlling my anger or allowed unforgiveness in my heart? Here is what the Bible says:
We all demonstrate selfishness, hatred, and pride. And unless something is done to cleanse of us of these ungodly attribute, we will stand before God guilty as charged. (paraphrase Romans 6:23) THAT'S WHY IF YOU ARE NOT RIGHT WITH GOD, you can't truly love your spouse, because He is the source of that love! Makes sens huh?! I haven't been able to love Cory the way he needed, the way God intended, because I haven't been truly, truly right with God! I haven't been in His word. I haven't' been praying like I should....But NOW, as this Sunday approaches. TODAY is a day of worship! Today is a day where I am right with God. Today is a day where I will love God, and I Will love Cory through God. Not of myself, but of GOD!
The one thing that is bothering me about today, is those I love who aren't in Christ. Marriages fail because someone isn't in Christ. I confess I haven't prayed for those like I should, and I must begin today. Without God's love in the marriage, things are hopeless. Agape love can't be generated. LOVE IS FROM GOD! (1 John 4:7)
But here is something to remember: "HE is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or thing, according tho the power that works within us" Eph 3:20 This is my new favorite verse!
My goal today: Stop resisting the Love of God. Stop rejecting his forgiveness and forgiveness of others. It is a tough road for me, which has caused depression. But I must focus on the LOVE OF GOD. The truth is I can't live without HIM, and I can't love Cory without him. Just imagine if I out my marriage in HIS hands?! Look what HE has already done!
Pray with me about something...I'm thinking of asking Cory to start doing the dare with me. Today actually starts Day 20 (I didn't blog yesterdays) and I feel that the beginning was all superficial..things I needed. I think we might could start growing as a family if we focus on the next 20, because it seems to be about your relationship with God more too. If he is reading this...maybe he will pray too! :)
Friday, January 14, 2011
Day 18: Love seeks to understand
DARE: Prepare a special dinner at home, just for the two of you. The dinner can be as nice as you prefer. Focus this time on getting to know your spouse better, perhaps in areas you've barely talked about. Determine to make it an enjoyable evening for you and your mate.
"How blessed it the man who finds wisdom, and the man who gains understanding." -
Prov 3:13
What are my priorities? What do I spend the msot time thinking about? I confess that over the lst couple of years, my priorities have been a little messed up. Before they woudl go soemthing a little like this: Naomi, work, running, church....notice there is no husband, there is no God. Even thought i had a relationship somewhat with both, they weren't on my top list of things to 'get done' that day. I've discovered that things I care most about, I find a way to enjoy. The book lists examples of reading articles above our favorite footbal team to see how they are doing (sorry Cory - from teh book- hehe). Looking up recipres and watching cooking shows ebcause we like to cook. Or for me, looking up running articles and bringing work home. All of these things reflect a subject that appeals to us, and we make it our personal study!!
The question is, how much time do I studying Cory? We all know how it goes. For men, they try to win the heart of their woman by learning likes, dislikes, habits, and hobbies. But after he wins her heart, he marries her, and often stops learning anything about her. The challenge is less intriguing, and interests might drifts to other areas. For a woman, we start by admiring and buildng respect for this man. But after marriage, those feelings fade as we find that our perfect man, isn't so perfect anymore. The problem is, there are still so many things to discover about our mates. EVen recently, I've learned things about Cory I never knew. Things that I wanted from him, but didn't give him enough honor and respect and confidence to folllow through with them. Let's face it ladies, we all want our husbands to eb the leader - the spriritual leader. But I know I haven't been giving Cory much confidence to do that. We all want to feel love and protected - but how can Cory even begin to do these things, we I'm hateful, bitter, and no fun to be around. A man wants a sole mate too! But mroe importantly, he wants to find favor! "Good understanding produces favor" Prov 13:15
So, here is a challenge for me. If hte amount of time I spent studying and dreaming about my spouse was equal to the time before we got married....how much more should I be interested in him now. HOw much more should I know about him now? I confess, no tmuch, but I feel that changing already. One of my friends noticed yesterday that I said "I miss Cory today. I jsut want to go home." What?! Is that Katrina Ms WORAHOLIC?! Another noticed that I wanted to give up running an errand so I could get home to my family. My old anser would have been, "I don't want to take tiem away from Naomi." But that is all about to change. Cory is fun to be around, or I wouldn't have chosen him. TO use his words "I wouldn't have chosen an ugly girl to marry." Which means for me to take this as - "your beautiful" hehehe
One thing you might leanr about your spouse during this process, is your differences. Small ones, big ones, medium ones. We make a big deal about all of these at times. Jude 10 tells us that we tend to 'revile' those things we don't understand. That's why we muist understand. There preferences are who they are. They make their character. BUt we must study to understand why they are that way. I can think of real issue for me right now, is the desire to be loved. I fought this my whole my life. We have finally determined that I feel the need to have the love of a man because of losing my daddy at such a young age. I didn't have that fatherly love when I needed it the most. I still wonder why God chose to take him from us so early, but He did, and that isn't my issue to question, but the result has molded my life. My desire now, and it is a struggle, is to find favor in God, not man. There are going ot be days (preaching to myself) that Cory might not see I need extra loving. My goal is to get it from God! Not whine to Cory, not look for it elsewhere, but turn to my one true comfort God. I've failed miserably at this before.
SO, to gain that closeness, to gain that intimacy with your spouse, here is what the book suggests:
1. Ask Questions
2. Listen
3. ASk for discernment
"By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; and by knowledge the rooms are filled with all the rpecious and pleasant riches." Prov 24:3-4
Today's dare will be hard for me to get accomplished. But I wont' forget it. Our hearts are changing, so wanting to do these great things for our spouse is becoming natural. My goal for the rest of my life, is leanr something new about husband each week. Something different. I've already learned this week he wants to be the spiritual leader -it's a process but he wants the job, he wants to protect me - I need this desperately, and he wants ME - something I thought he didn't even want to be around for years. It is step in the right direction! And I'm learning more and more each day - Cory is amazing!
"How blessed it the man who finds wisdom, and the man who gains understanding." -
Prov 3:13
What are my priorities? What do I spend the msot time thinking about? I confess that over the lst couple of years, my priorities have been a little messed up. Before they woudl go soemthing a little like this: Naomi, work, running, church....notice there is no husband, there is no God. Even thought i had a relationship somewhat with both, they weren't on my top list of things to 'get done' that day. I've discovered that things I care most about, I find a way to enjoy. The book lists examples of reading articles above our favorite footbal team to see how they are doing (sorry Cory - from teh book- hehe). Looking up recipres and watching cooking shows ebcause we like to cook. Or for me, looking up running articles and bringing work home. All of these things reflect a subject that appeals to us, and we make it our personal study!!
The question is, how much time do I studying Cory? We all know how it goes. For men, they try to win the heart of their woman by learning likes, dislikes, habits, and hobbies. But after he wins her heart, he marries her, and often stops learning anything about her. The challenge is less intriguing, and interests might drifts to other areas. For a woman, we start by admiring and buildng respect for this man. But after marriage, those feelings fade as we find that our perfect man, isn't so perfect anymore. The problem is, there are still so many things to discover about our mates. EVen recently, I've learned things about Cory I never knew. Things that I wanted from him, but didn't give him enough honor and respect and confidence to folllow through with them. Let's face it ladies, we all want our husbands to eb the leader - the spriritual leader. But I know I haven't been giving Cory much confidence to do that. We all want to feel love and protected - but how can Cory even begin to do these things, we I'm hateful, bitter, and no fun to be around. A man wants a sole mate too! But mroe importantly, he wants to find favor! "Good understanding produces favor" Prov 13:15
So, here is a challenge for me. If hte amount of time I spent studying and dreaming about my spouse was equal to the time before we got married....how much more should I be interested in him now. HOw much more should I know about him now? I confess, no tmuch, but I feel that changing already. One of my friends noticed yesterday that I said "I miss Cory today. I jsut want to go home." What?! Is that Katrina Ms WORAHOLIC?! Another noticed that I wanted to give up running an errand so I could get home to my family. My old anser would have been, "I don't want to take tiem away from Naomi." But that is all about to change. Cory is fun to be around, or I wouldn't have chosen him. TO use his words "I wouldn't have chosen an ugly girl to marry." Which means for me to take this as - "your beautiful" hehehe
One thing you might leanr about your spouse during this process, is your differences. Small ones, big ones, medium ones. We make a big deal about all of these at times. Jude 10 tells us that we tend to 'revile' those things we don't understand. That's why we muist understand. There preferences are who they are. They make their character. BUt we must study to understand why they are that way. I can think of real issue for me right now, is the desire to be loved. I fought this my whole my life. We have finally determined that I feel the need to have the love of a man because of losing my daddy at such a young age. I didn't have that fatherly love when I needed it the most. I still wonder why God chose to take him from us so early, but He did, and that isn't my issue to question, but the result has molded my life. My desire now, and it is a struggle, is to find favor in God, not man. There are going ot be days (preaching to myself) that Cory might not see I need extra loving. My goal is to get it from God! Not whine to Cory, not look for it elsewhere, but turn to my one true comfort God. I've failed miserably at this before.
SO, to gain that closeness, to gain that intimacy with your spouse, here is what the book suggests:
1. Ask Questions
2. Listen
3. ASk for discernment
"By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; and by knowledge the rooms are filled with all the rpecious and pleasant riches." Prov 24:3-4
Today's dare will be hard for me to get accomplished. But I wont' forget it. Our hearts are changing, so wanting to do these great things for our spouse is becoming natural. My goal for the rest of my life, is leanr something new about husband each week. Something different. I've already learned this week he wants to be the spiritual leader -it's a process but he wants the job, he wants to protect me - I need this desperately, and he wants ME - something I thought he didn't even want to be around for years. It is step in the right direction! And I'm learning more and more each day - Cory is amazing!
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Verse helping me get through the day....
1 John 3:19-20
By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything.
Philippians 3:13
Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,
Psalm 103:12
As far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.
Colossians 3:8
But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.
By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything.
Philippians 3:13
Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,
Psalm 103:12
As far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.
Colossians 3:8
But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.
emotions
I came home lost night discouraged, scared, wondering why God even wanted to use me. Why I was even alive!! But I woke up this morning differently. God has layed his hand on Cory. God has carried him through so much. God has blessed me with him. We shared forgiveness. We hsraed a newness with Christ. And now we get to share a newness with each other all over again. We now have a second anniversary to celebrate the rest of our lives!
My text today from him confirmed his love for me, and his devotion to this family. He wants to be my husband!!!!! He wants to be the spiritual leader (every girls dream)!!! Thank you God for answered prayers. Thank-you for this newness in you! Thank-you for not giving up on us, and opening up the doors for forgiveness and love. REAL LOVE!!!
My text today from him confirmed his love for me, and his devotion to this family. He wants to be my husband!!!!! He wants to be the spiritual leader (every girls dream)!!! Thank you God for answered prayers. Thank-you for this newness in you! Thank-you for not giving up on us, and opening up the doors for forgiveness and love. REAL LOVE!!!
day skipped - Day 13 - Love fights Fair
Well, yesterday I was actually counting up how many days and when I started this dare, and found that I actually skipped a day. Day 13. I won't apologize for this or say I can't believe I done this. I didn't do this. God did this. God has flipped me around in this book and gave me what I needed for the day I needed it. Even when things feel low, I have to remember He is there with His arms wide open. it is me who always pulls away...and I don't want to do that ever again!
So, today, there is a reason I will be going back to Day 13: Love fights fair. it is funny because today I'm feeling a little numb. A little spacy, so today's dare, God conviently put in my lap because he knows Cory and I Hardly ever fight. We don't. We don't have that violent loud relationship like some have, and that works for them. Cory and I only get loud and really fight when things have been boiling for a long time. Good or bad...we both work that way. We don't like confrontation. So, for all you reading this today, I hope it will be something that helps you, and something that helps me, without me knwoing it!
DARE: Talk with yout spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to fight by. Resolve and abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.
Mark 3:25 -If a house is divided against itself, that house will NOT be able to stand.
AS I read the verse above, I realize that this DARE is for me today!!! It isn't just fighting that divides a house. It can be silent disagreements. Silent anger. Silent bitterness. All of this can divide house, and the Lord says, it WILL. Who wants to live in a house divided? (and I'm not talking about college football) Of course, there are more verses in the Bible that teach against divorce, so that isn't what this day intends. This day intends for you to stop being divided and start being one. Some days are easy, some days are very hard. Cory and I can a test to that. But God commands His holy Matrimony to be ONE.
Conflict is inevitable. When I married, even though Cory got all my hopes and dreams, he got all my hurts, fears, imperfections, non-stableness, and just baggage! He got it all! All that ugly stuff we tend to hide when we are dating. All the ugliness, that sometimes You don't even realize you have. Cory got it! But this began the marriage, unpleasantly discovering how selfish each of us could be. Pretty soon that pedestal that Cory had me on began to tilt, and I slipped off. And finally revealed to him my private problems and my secret habits...Welcome to sin. Welcome to fallen humanity!
Then life began....work, pregnancy issues, getting used to each other's families, financial issues and many other things began to chip at us. But we aren't alone....i think every couple goes through this at point. Every couple reacts differently, based on their insecurities, and unfortunately, every couple doesn't survive it! Oh God, how I want to survive - for us and for Naomi!
So, I'm pretty sure with all the examples above, this dare won't end conflict. In some ways, conflict is good. But how you deal with conflict is what matters! And did I say, How you deal with conflict TOGETHER? I have always had a bad habit or just telling him to forget about it. Ad typically I do. I'm not one that brings stuff up over and over again. I'd rather ignore, like it never happened and move on. But the book tells me to face it - together.
A real love marriage isn't created to self-destruct. When conflict arises, I must chose to work through it, instead of my usual pattern of trying to sleep it off. And hopefully, one day, Cory and I can have one of the most intimate, trusting relationships you will find.
The book lists some examples of "we" and "me" boundaries. I will list them below and try to think of my own somewhere throughout the day, although these pretty much nail it for me.
"WE"
never mention divorce!
don't bring up past items - forgive and move on
don't 'fight' in public or in front of your kids...period! (discussions fine)
call 'time-out' if getting ugly
never touch each other harmfully
never go to bed angry
failure is not an option
"ME"
Listen before speaking James 1:9
Deal with my own issues up front - Matt 7:3
Speak gentle and keep voice down - Prov 15:1
Fighting fair, the book says, means changing your weapons. Disagree with dignity, like Jesus is in the room watching you - because He is!
Love is not a fight, but it is worth fighting for! (this is my new moto)
So, today, there is a reason I will be going back to Day 13: Love fights fair. it is funny because today I'm feeling a little numb. A little spacy, so today's dare, God conviently put in my lap because he knows Cory and I Hardly ever fight. We don't. We don't have that violent loud relationship like some have, and that works for them. Cory and I only get loud and really fight when things have been boiling for a long time. Good or bad...we both work that way. We don't like confrontation. So, for all you reading this today, I hope it will be something that helps you, and something that helps me, without me knwoing it!
DARE: Talk with yout spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to fight by. Resolve and abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.
Mark 3:25 -If a house is divided against itself, that house will NOT be able to stand.
AS I read the verse above, I realize that this DARE is for me today!!! It isn't just fighting that divides a house. It can be silent disagreements. Silent anger. Silent bitterness. All of this can divide house, and the Lord says, it WILL. Who wants to live in a house divided? (and I'm not talking about college football) Of course, there are more verses in the Bible that teach against divorce, so that isn't what this day intends. This day intends for you to stop being divided and start being one. Some days are easy, some days are very hard. Cory and I can a test to that. But God commands His holy Matrimony to be ONE.
Conflict is inevitable. When I married, even though Cory got all my hopes and dreams, he got all my hurts, fears, imperfections, non-stableness, and just baggage! He got it all! All that ugly stuff we tend to hide when we are dating. All the ugliness, that sometimes You don't even realize you have. Cory got it! But this began the marriage, unpleasantly discovering how selfish each of us could be. Pretty soon that pedestal that Cory had me on began to tilt, and I slipped off. And finally revealed to him my private problems and my secret habits...Welcome to sin. Welcome to fallen humanity!
Then life began....work, pregnancy issues, getting used to each other's families, financial issues and many other things began to chip at us. But we aren't alone....i think every couple goes through this at point. Every couple reacts differently, based on their insecurities, and unfortunately, every couple doesn't survive it! Oh God, how I want to survive - for us and for Naomi!
So, I'm pretty sure with all the examples above, this dare won't end conflict. In some ways, conflict is good. But how you deal with conflict is what matters! And did I say, How you deal with conflict TOGETHER? I have always had a bad habit or just telling him to forget about it. Ad typically I do. I'm not one that brings stuff up over and over again. I'd rather ignore, like it never happened and move on. But the book tells me to face it - together.
A real love marriage isn't created to self-destruct. When conflict arises, I must chose to work through it, instead of my usual pattern of trying to sleep it off. And hopefully, one day, Cory and I can have one of the most intimate, trusting relationships you will find.
The book lists some examples of "we" and "me" boundaries. I will list them below and try to think of my own somewhere throughout the day, although these pretty much nail it for me.
"WE"
never mention divorce!
don't bring up past items - forgive and move on
don't 'fight' in public or in front of your kids...period! (discussions fine)
call 'time-out' if getting ugly
never touch each other harmfully
never go to bed angry
failure is not an option
"ME"
Listen before speaking James 1:9
Deal with my own issues up front - Matt 7:3
Speak gentle and keep voice down - Prov 15:1
Fighting fair, the book says, means changing your weapons. Disagree with dignity, like Jesus is in the room watching you - because He is!
Love is not a fight, but it is worth fighting for! (this is my new moto)
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